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Thursday, 28 June 2012

Tuesday, 26 June 2012

In Queer US News

By: Liberate Zealot

In Maryland, which became the 8th state to legalize same-sex marriage in March, The Maryland Marriage Alliance (heterosexist group) has officially gotten enough signatures on their petition to bring the law to the public ballot, in fact they've far exceeded it. Which is such wonderful news to get at 12:30 am when you're getting ready for bed, as I did last night.  Also, absolutely great that this was so perfectly timed with PRIDE. So another reason to make sure you're registered and go to vote in Maryland. 

Speaking of same-sex marriage being something straight people get to decide, Gay Marriage is back on the ballot for Maine.  This is three years after they voted it down, and local advocates feel there has been enough of a shift on public opinion that there's reason to believe it will pass this time around.  Hopefully so, and if you're in Maine, remember to vote.

The vote on same sex marriage was also a focus for the Seattle, Washington PRIDE. Seattle Mayor Mike McGinn joined the 300 "get engaged" marchers. Washington Gov. Chris Gregiore, who earlier this year signed a bill into law that legalized gay marriage, was grand marshal of the parade. 

In honor of PRIDE, Oreo came out with a Rainbow Oreo on Monday.  So far it's only a picture on their Facebook Page, but people are already asking them to make this cookie a reality.  Personally, if they do make this something people can buy, I hope the proceeds would go to help queer people. Anyway, I hope Oreo's support is more than one statement and a potential product targeted to queer people. 

Apparently Entertainment Weekly thinks Merida, the princess from Brave is a lesbian. Because she's a tomboy you know? Chris Heller from the Atlantic has a nice response about the possibilities (after all she could be queer, straight, or asexual) and what those mean. 

Laura Flanders writes in the Nation, Queer Issues are Class Issues, about how the LGBTQ movement needs to become more exclusive.  Specifically in regards to class issues and how the homomentum isn't happening for queer people living in or near poverty. 

(Content Warning - Violence, Holocaust)

Friday, 22 June 2012

Family Relationships and the Catholic Church

By: Liberate Zealot
Cross posted on F.A.R tumblr
Content Warning: Catholic Church, reference of sexual violence

So I've been meaning to write this post for a while, and this is my third attempt this week.  But every time I start something else comes up, I need to play with the kitten, or make home made soup, or some such thing.   Really it's just hard to articulate exactly what I want to say and express, so I've found other things to occupy my mind.

As is mentioned in my bio, my brother is a Future Priest, he's just finished his first year in a Catholic seminary.  He decided he wanted to do this two years ago, and while my parents and I aren't exactly happy about it, we haven't tried to talk him out of it and guilt trip him about it.  We respect his right to decide what is best and right for his own life.  And he knows I have issues with the Catholic Church, and took the time to talk to be about how he doesn't support their stance on Gay Marriage.  Which was nice, but rather missed the point.

Which since then he did an interview with his college and discussed how his family reacted, and mentioned me as being unsupportive.  He's also written several letters, 
with lots of religious platitude, about how he feels this change/separation in our relationship.  And the amount of not getting it is staggering and heart breaking. 

We see each other at family things a couple times a year (we live in different states so that would be the extent of it no matter what). And don't discuss the issues then, because it wouldn't be pretty and we don't want to ruin the holidays or whatever for everyone.

And I've never responded to his letters, and he hasn't forced the issue with phone calls or anything.  The reason is, I think it would ruin what relationship we still have (and I hate to be vulnerable).  But here's what I might say.

The Vatican is anti-woman and anti-queer, and it is actively so. It seeks to push it's own beliefs on everyone else in the world.  And to be a priest is to support that, the Vatican demands you support it. And this is oppressive to my very being.  I am a queer woman, and the Vatican is against me, against my identity.  Not only within it's churches, but in the public streets and the halls of government as well. It seeks to oppress me, and requires its priests, eventually my brother, to do the same.
And this is something I should be supportive of? And don't speak of reforming from the inside.  The nuns might happily and vocally defy the Vatican when it comes to its political involvement and stance on queer rights and choice, but I don't see any priests doing that.  And my brother never did in the past, is it suddenly to change once he gets his vestments, then he'll become an ally, when he never was before?
And so my brother has picked a hierarchical and Kyriarchal institution that actively seeks to oppress his own sister.  Of course our relationship has changed.  It wasn't me who changed it.  I might still love my brother.  But how can I trust and respect someone who will take a leadership position within a group that hates and seeks to suppress and outlaw my rights, my autonomy, my personhood? 

I cried when I saw that interview.  And I don't cry often, the only other times what year were about dealing with the sexual violence I endured.
In a way his decision to join the Catholic Priesthood and belief that I should support him was as much an attack on my person as the sexual violence.  Both erased my autonomy, my right to personal control and emotions.
I never expected that from my brother.  

Maybe some day I'll have the strength to say or write all of this to him. But right now the potential fallout isn't worth the clearing of my mind.  I'm not ready yet. 

Sunday, 17 June 2012

Babe, is this Sexist? Father's Day Edition

Babe, is this Sexist? Comes to you on a special day for our special edition dedicated to Fathers.  Generally we only cover one thing per post, but today, as a gift, here are 3 sexist/sex discrimination things!

First  up, the most popular (from the poll) option that was found while looking through Amazon (a mistake) for Father's Day Gifts.

And FUCK YES this is SEXIST!

  • It's made by Focus on the Family and oh how they suck.
  • "Authentic" Manhood, I'm gonna guess it's all about being "masculine" and heterosexist. And remember positing "Masculine" as the only way to be an authentic man places man/masculine as better than woman/feminine is super misogynistic!
Now onto the runner-up. Huggies Dad Test Ad Campaign.

"To prove Huggies Diapers can handle anything we put them to the ULTIMATE test, Dads."
Because men are suck and bumbling parents! So Sex Discrimination against men.  And also sexism since the idea is built on the benevolent sexist framing of women as natural caregivers.

So Huggies pulled the ads and supposedly put up a Pro-Dad version.  But we're not really seeing a difference since it still suggests that dad's make a better test for diapers since they're not as good with babies and baby things as moms. 

And finally, no votes, but a charming Father's Day gift suggestion from Target!

Just what dad needs, a place to escape from all those wimminz!  Because men totes need a safe space on top of their privileged existence in public/pretty much every place ever! 
So yeah, this is sexist. 

So to sum up, after a hard day of failing with babies, raising their son's to be "authentic" men in the finest traditions of misogyny and heterosexism, Dad's need a place to escape from those nagging women! 

Or they can continue being decent people and good parents. And for all the father's that manage this, 
Happy Father's Day!

Saturday, 16 June 2012

The BFD (Big Fucking Dictionary) of Activism and Inclusion

By: Liberate Zealot

An evolving dictionary/glossery of words and terms used by the Hivemind.
*If I've missed any or you know of alternative definitions please let me know!
*I'm trying to be as gender neutral as possible, for a list of gender neutral pronouns see here.

  • Ableism - Prejudiced thoughts/speech/actions against people with mental/physical/emotional disabilities (differing abilities). 
  • Accesibility - The extent to which a place (often but not always a location) is accessible to everyone, generally, but not always refers to people with disabilities. 
  • Advocate - A person who speaks for hirself, hir community, and/or a disadvantaged community.  See self-advocate. 
  • Ally - A person from one (normally privileged) group who stands up with and supports members of an oppressed group.
  • Androgyn* (e, ous, y) - A person whose biological sex and/or gender is not readily aparent, and/or identifies between the two main genders, who presents as both masculine and feminine, and/or has cast of gender/gender roles completely.
  • Appropriation - Specifically cultural appropriation is as aspect of racism where people from a dominant group take on a part of the culture from an oppressed group that they continue to marginalize. Different from cultural appreciation, but it's a thin line.
  • Aromantic - A person who does not feel romantic attraction/feelings for others. Sometimes, but not always related to being asexual.  
  • Asexual - A person who does not feel sexual attraction to others. It can be, but not always is related to being aromantic. 
  • Benevolent Sexism - A type of sexism that is based on protecting/caring for men.  Often confused for chivalry and/or female privilege. 
  • Bias - Prejudice, an inclination, world view, or preference that limits understanding and impartiality.  Everyone has some biases.
  • Bigotry - Intolerant prejudice which glorifies ones own group and denigrates people of other groups/identities. 
  • Biphobia - Fear, dislike, hatred of people who are bisexual.
  • Bisexual - People who are sexually and or romantically attracted to people of at least two genders. Often is used interchangablely with pansexual. 
  • Cis*(gender/sexual/man/woman) - A prefix that means on the same side as. A person (man/male, women/female) whose sex and gender are the same as what they were assigned at birth. 
  • Cissexism - Discrimination and prejudice against trans* people. 
  • Classism - Discrimination/prejudice against people of different classes, often used specifically for when done by upper-class people against low-classes.  
  • Color Blind - The idea of treating everyone "equally" by ignoring (not "seeing") differences.  First used in regards to race, but the idea is used in other areas of inequality/oppression.  Has sense been proved to actually increase/support racism
  • Disability - A physical/mental/emotional "impairment" that results in special needs.  One can be born with, or gain a disability. Some people with disabilities prefer the term differently abled. When discussing disabilities remember to use person first language (person with Autism) and/or the terms/language prefered by the person/group with the disability.
  • Discrimination - Prejudiced treatement or people/groups.
  • Dominant Culture - The cultural values, practices, and beliefs that is considered the most common, mainstream, influential within a society. Very tied into the white, straight, (Christian), able bodied, able minded, cismale, masculine identity (though this can/does change between cultures and sub-groups). 
  • Empower(ed/ment) - When oppressed group members take/feel power, often by refusing to accept the dominant/oppressive culture.  Very tied to choice and liberal feminism. 
  • Ethnic(ity) - Divides people into smaller groups based on culture and/or country of origin.  I'm some places it's tied very closely to race in other's it is more seperate. 
  • F to M/FtM/F2M - Female to male.An abbreviation used to signify a type sex/gender change, normally used by transsexual men. 
  • FAAB - Female assigned at birth. Used in trans* and genderqueer communities to describe the sex/gender doctors/parents assigned/believed one to be.  Can be used by cis/trans/genderqueer people.  
  • Female - A sex identification, seperate from gender.  It's based on genitals, genetics, and mental sex. 
  • Feminism - "The radical notion that women are people". The belief that women deserve equality and the actions taken to ensure this. A large theory with many subgroups. 
  • Gaslighting - Emotional/mental manipulation or policing used to control discredit people who are disagreeing/challenging the gaslighter. 
  • Gender - The idea of women and men, sometimes considered to be a social construct, very assosiated with presentation - feminine/masculine and gender roles.  Depending of the person these things are seen as all the same or seperate but informed by each other. 
  • Gendered - Assosiated/Having to do with a gender, often tied to presentation or gender roles. Ex. pink and blue are gendered colors. 
  • Gender and Sexual Minorities - People who are not heterosexual or cis*. Normally used as an umbrella term, generally not used as an idenity. 
  • Genderqueer - People who identity as both/inbetween/neither men and women and or male and female or is in anyway gender noncomformist.  Both an umbrella term and an identity.
  • Hate Crime - A crime motivated by the actual or percieved race, sexuality, religion, ethnicity, country of origin, gender, gender identity, or disability of the victim.  Different states and countries protect different groups under hate crime laws (if they classify crimes as hate crimes or offer any protections/punishments for hate crimes). 
  • Heterocentric - Placing heterosexuality as the dominant culture. 
  • Heterosexism - The belief that everyone is or should be heterosexual.  growing to replace the word homophobic. 
  • Heterosexual - A person who is attracted to the opposite sex, specifically refers to male/female, but can refer to to people who care more about gender and less about genitals. 
  • Homophobia - Fear/hatred of people who are homosexual (and other non-heterosexual people). Some people dislike assosiating this is phobias which are a legitimate medical problem. Heterosexism is replacing this word in some spaces.  
  • Homosexual - A person who is attracted to other's of the same sex.  Sometimes used by people who feel an attraction to only the same gender, but don't care about genitals. 
  • Inclusive - Open to and accessible to all peoples (or at least as much as is possible).
  • -Ism - A word that means prejudice + power.  Ex. racism can only be down to people of color, sexism can only be done to women.  Not everyone uses this defition and they will probably use insitutional/cultural when discussing this dynamic.  
  • Internalized * (Racism/Sexism/Heterosexism) - When an oppressed group has bought into the oppressive ideas/actions and supports the dominance and supremacy of the dominant group.
  • Intersectional(ity) - The connecting/relating/intersecting oppressions faced by people who are some combination of non white/straight/cis/male/Christian/wealthy/ablebodied/ableminded/and more). Also refers to the belief/understanding/action based on intersecting oppressions. FAR Intersectionality,
  • Intersex - A person who with born biologically intermediate between male and female.  Refers to gentials and genetics.  Can also refer to ambiguous genitals but only one time of sex tissue/organs/genes. 
  • Kyriarchy - A continuation of Patriarchy theory that addresses Intersectional oppression/structures. On Archy.
  • Lesbian - A woman who is attracted to other women. 
  • LGBT - The most mainstream acronym that addresses GSM people. Stands of Lesbian, Gay, Bi, Trans. It critiqued for lack of inclusion, and also that many communities that call themselves LGBT are less accepting of Bi and Trans people. 
  • LGBTQIAQAT - Lesbian, Gay, Bi, Trans, Queer, Intersex, Asexual, Questioning, Androgynous, Two-Spirit. An acronym that lists more types of GSM people. It's rare that all of these will be used at once. 
  • M to F/MtF/M2F - Male to Female. An abreviation used to refer to a type of sex/gender change.  Mainly used by transexual women.
  • MAAB - Male assigned at birth. Used in trans* and genderqueer communities to describe the sex/gender doctors/parents assigned/believed one to be.  Can be used by cis/trans/genderqueer people.
  • Mansplain - The act of a man condecendingly explaining things to a women, speficially about things she knows more of.  Often related to feminism, sexism and/or a woman/female experience. 'Splain is used for the same attitude/dynamic when it does not involve a man 'splaining to a woman. 
  • Marginalized - Excluded or ignored opressed people/groups. 
  • Misogyny - Hatred of women.  Seeing them as less than and Other.
  • MRA - Men's Right Activists. Classified as a hate group by the Southern Poverty Law Center. See for info on their beliefs/rhetoric. 
  • Multiplicity - The quality of having multiple and simultanious social identities. Unlike intersectionality it is not always assosiated with oppression. 
  • Naming - "When we articulate a thought that has normally not been discussed." Can refer to the culture and/or individual. 
  • Oppression - The systematic and pervasive inequality that results from institutional privilege and power where one group benefits at the expense of another. 
  • Othering - An oppressive and kyriarchal/patriarchal method of stereotyping characteristics/roles onto groups as a way to explain oppression. Results in Us and Other categories with Other, naturally, getting the short end of the stick. 
  • Pansexual - The attraction to people are various/all types of sex, gender, and presentation. Some people use this interchangably with bisexual, other's see them as distinct sexualities. 
  • Patriarchy - The system of oppression that favors men and results in the Othering and oppression of women. On Archy.
  • People of Color - A collecting term for people who are of Asian, African, Latin, Middle Eastern, and/or Native/Aboriginal backgrounds.  As opposed to white people from a European background. 
  • Polyamory - The practice of having multiple open and honest love/romantic relationships. 
  • Prejudice - A, usually negative, bias or preconcieved belief/judgement about a person or group of people.
  • Privilege - A right, license, and/or excemption that only some people have access or avialability to because of group memberships. 
  • Queer - An umbrella term and/or identity for anyone who is a GSM. 
  • Questioning - Someone who is uncertain of hir sexuality/gender identity.
  • Racism - Discrimination and/or prejudice against people based on their real or percieved race.  Usually refers to the actions/thoughts of white people against people of color. Can manifest in many ways. 
  • Religion - A system of spiritual beliefs, often tied to culture, and normally of an organized variety. 
  • Safe Space - And area/location where people are free of oppression and feel able to honestly and openly express their feelings and experiences.
  • Self-Advocate - A person who advocates for themselves.  This differentiation from advocate is mainly used amongst disability activists.  
  • Sex - The biological classification of male, female, intersex that is based on genetics and or physiological features. 
  • Sexism - Discrimination and prejudice based on sex and/or gender, usually by men against women. Can manifest in many ways. 
  • Sexual Orientation - A person's sexual/romantic preference/attraction/interest in others. 
  • Silencing - The intentional or accidental process in which the voices and participation of people of oppressed groups are ignored, discredited, excluded, and/or inhibited. 
  • Social Justice - A term for actions intended to increase the equality/fairness/justice for all oppressed peoples. 
  • Stereotype - Blanket beliefs/views about people from different groups. Ex. Blonds are dumb, black people are lazy. 
  • System of Oppression - The conscious and un-conscious, organized, insitutionalized discrimination, prejudice, and exploitation of oppressed peoples. 
  • Tolerance - Acceptance of the differences of others, does not always mean agreement or support and so is not always the prefered term of activists/advocates. 
  • Transphobia - Fear/hatred of people who are and/or are perceived to be trans.  Has the same critiques as the term homophobia and expresses the same ideas as cissexism. 
  • Trans* - an umbrella term that includes as variety of people who defy/change their sex/gender.  Normally used to refer to people who are transgender and/or transexual.  Can also refer to drag queens/kings, cross-dressers, and anyone who is any type of genderqueer.
  • Transgender - People who identify as a gender different than the one which they were assigned at birth. 
  • Transmisogyny - Misogyny as experienced by trans women.  Specifically the increased attention/fear/hatred/violence they experience compared to other trans people.
  • Transexual - A person who identifies as a different gender and sex than the one they where assigned at birth.  Can refer to people who have had genital reconstuctive surgery and/or those those have not had any surgeries. 
  • Two - Spirit - A Native American/First Nations term with no exact English relation.  Best translations assosiate it with the word queer, and/or people who are both men and women.  Can be used to describe several types of GSM identities.

    Main Resource 

Monday, 11 June 2012

Babe, is this Sexist? Returns

Babe, is this Sexist is starting up again.  And if you're a USian it's just in time for Father's Day.  So our theme this week is fathers and father's day.  Check out of Facebook page for the poll!

Monday, 4 June 2012

Let's Talk About Sex

By: Liberate Zealot
Content Warning: Rape culture

Or more accurately let's talk about how we talk about sex.  The narratives surrounding sex and the words and expressions used when we do talk about sex. Specifically let's talk about how these things are often major contributors to rape culture.

By the nature of what I'm discussing and Kyriarchal culture this will be somewhat heterosexist and trans/genderqueer erasing.  When possible I will be gender/sex neutral.  So while the language/narratives discussed are not inclusive I will try to be so. 

Analogous to analogues: building a better analogy.

The following is cross-posted from the Damsel in de Tech blog. Click here to see the original.

SlutWalk Toronto 2012 went down on Friday, May 25th with a good turnout, fair weather, and great spirit. And now, of course, there are more articles coming out that decide to completely miss the point and to do so by abusing an oft-misused literary device: the analogy.

Remember in the 90's when everyone was irked with Alanis Morrisette for ironically writing a song called "Ironic" which misused the term "irony"?

Irony: ur doing it rong. Ironically. Or then you're doing it right? I think the universe just collapsed in on itself.
Now, on to some of the "new" criticisms (by new I mean an article published recently, the argument itself has been unsuccessfully rehashed more times than I can count). According to Mike Strobel, " advice to travellers on Manitoulin is not to dress like a deer, despite your perfect right to do so." Go ahead and wade through if you haven't heard the "but the officer was just trying to be helpful, you ignorant harpies"-argument a million times. At least this article is brief.
Another author has already responded quite eloquently to the above article, but I'd like to address more fully the problems with this, and many other analogies that get tossed around when criticizing the SlutWalk movement.

First, let's please take a moment to look at the dictionary definition of what an analogy is (supposed) to be:

  • analogy[uh-nal-uh-jee]   Origin
    /əˈnælədʒi/ Show Spelled[uh-nal-uh-jee] Show IPA
    noun, plural a·nal·o·gies.
    1. a similarity between like features of two things, on which a comparison may be based: the analogy between the heart and a pump.
    2. similarity or comparability: I see no analogy between your problem and mine.
    3. Biology . an analogous relationship.
    4. Linguistics . a. the process by which words or phrases are created or re-formed according to existing patterns in the language, as when shoon  was re-formed as shoes,  when -ize  is added to nouns like winter  to form verbs, or when a child says foots  for feet.
    b. a form resulting from such a process.
    5. Logic . a form of reasoning in which one thing is inferred to be similar to another thing in a certain respect, on the basis of the known similarity between the things in other respects.
Now that we've covered what an analogy is, let's take a look at a couple of examples of what an analogy isn't:
  • Comparing two items that are totally different, like apples and orangutans
  • Comparing rape to theft
  • Comparing women's bodies (specifically their vaginas) to items that can be stealthily removed and stolen 
  • Comparing rapists (usually implying they're all men) to mindless animals
These bastardizations of analogies come up so often, that they offend my pedantic sensibilities almost as much as they offend the anti-rape activist in me. Let's break down a couple of the most common ones:

Bad analogy: If you dress like a deer on Manitoulin island, you're liable to get shot. Therefore, dress "safely".
Why it's a bad analogy: So many things wrong with this analogy that it makes my head hurt. Firstly, it buys into the Dave Chappelle-esque "whore's uniform" trope that there is a specific outfit that marks one as a sex worker and therefore invites all manner of abuse. In regards to that point, long story short, sex workers don't deserve to be victims of sexual violence. Full-stop.
Also, in this analogy, the hunter is going out with the intention to shoot and kill a deer. The analogue would be a rapist who goes out with the intention to rape someone. You don't have to look "like a deer", you just have to have the misfortunte of being in the viscinity of the intended rapist. If someone goes out with the intention of raping someone, then more than likely they will succeed in their mission. Not because of clothing of their victim, but because the rapist made the decision and made the conditions happen for them to be able to attack and assault someone. And if they "accidentally" rape a virgin, or a mother, or someone with greater social value than a sex worker? Sex workers don't deserve to be targets of sexual violence any more than anyone else, so there is no win either way, unless the rapist is stopped, caught, arrested, or our justice system and culture are changed to make rapists less likely to attempt and get away with sexual assault.

Bad analogy:
If you walk around in a poor neighbourhood waving money, you're liable to get mugged. Therefore, dress more conservatively so you don't get raped.
Why it's a bad analogy: Firstly, articles of clothing have not been shown to increase the chance of one being a victim of sexual violence. If there were an article of clothing that did prevent rape, I'd be spending my time encouraging people to wear it. I'd buy stock, I'd buy in bulk, I'd give this magical item of clothing away on the streetcorners. Secondly, as a woman who is largely femme and passes as a woman, I don't have to do naked cartwheels for people to know I have a vagina. There's no amount of more or less vagina that I have that is more likely to attract a rapist. Rapists don't see someone in tight clothing and suddenly think, "My golly. That person is in possession of a vagina! I was going to go golfing or to see a movie, but now I've decided I'm going to sexually assault them instead." Heck, rape doesn't just happen vaginally, so even the absense of a vagina doesn't protect me if someone wants to victimize me.
A partial side-note to this analogy is that it also draws largely on the trope of rapists only hanging in alleys or "bad" neighbourhoods or someplace dimly lit, with fog machines and scary theme music. This is not how the majority of rapes happen. Most rapes occur in the victim's home by someone they know. That, imo, is much scarier than the alley trope. I can generally avoid alleys (unless access to my apartment or place of employment goes through an alley, or if I find myself homeless and seek refuge in an alley, or any of a million other reasons why alleys exist and people go through them), but avoiding home is a whole 'nother kettle of fish.

Bad analogy: You wouldn't wave a piece of raw meat in front of a lion, so don't flaunt your body in front of men if you don't want to get raped.
Why it's a bad analogy: I've talked about this before, so I'll be brief: this analogy tends to paint women as victims and men as aggressors, and does so in the most insulting way to men. According to people who trot out this tired trope, men are slavering, mindless beasts who can be prompted to attack at the slightest provocation because they just can't help themselves. This is ludicrously insulting to the vast majority of men who are not rapists, and ignores the fact that rapists are very much in control of themselves and that the act of rape is purposeful act of violence.

Bad analogy: When you put your goods on display like that, of course people are going to want to sample the merchandize. Dress demurely and you won't be assaulted.
Why it's a bad analogy: My breasts aren't "goods". My ass and legs aren't "goods". They're not something that can be bought and sold piecemeal, separate from my identity, from my person, from my good and bad deeds as a human being. We all come together, lest something dramatic and tragic happens to separate me from my body parts. Furthermore, people of all gender expressions and sexual identities are sexually harassed and assaulted in all manner of clothing, at all ages, regardless of whether they are perceived as traditionally "attractive". Sexual harassment and assault doesn't stop just because someone decided to wear a turtleneck on a particular day. If it did, I'd be investing in stock.

So, when someone tries to explain to the "poor, silly, misguided, estrogen-addled wimmins" why they're wrong when they protest against rape myths like adhering to a particular dress code, with these woefully misguided and erroneous "analogies", either point them to this blog or start singing some Alanis Morrissette really loudly until they get uncomfortable and leave. Your mileage may vary.