Now, this was supposed to go up on Wednesday, but than shit happened (trigger warning for link). So now, finally, we're having the winner for the relationship memes/tropes installment of Babe, Is this Sexist? (Also yes, Daniel Tosh does win this award in perpetuity from here on out).
"Ze does it because ze loves me"*
Now yes this is sexist, and the reason is it's a major part of abusive relationships while also being sold, by the media, as the proper response from women when their partner does something inappropriate/abusive. See Twilight for examples.
Love (and often in cases of abuse love is more to obsession or a sense of ownership than, you know, actual facts love) does not excuse bad actions on the part of a sexual/romantic partner, or a parent, or a friend, or anyone.
This exact concept is often part of the controlling that an abuser does before the serious emotional/physical/sexual abuse starts.
Submit suggestions for the next installment of Babe, is this Sexist? Which is looking to be more of a once or twice a month installment, rather than the weekly thing it once was. If interest in this picks up and the suggestions pour in than this might change again.
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* Ze is a gender neutral pro-noun.
Go to the "Babe, is this Sexist?" Masterpost
If you or someone you know is in an abusive relationship, or you worry you/they might be, please feel free to contact us for information and resources.
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"Twilight"? I'm sure everything they say about it is true, but surprised you didn't mention "50 Shades". Here are some of the highlights:
ReplyDelete1 Ana says (yet again) that she is not a submissive.
Christian orders her not to be flirtatious or even friendly with his staff.
Ana apologises.
2 Ana's male friend Jose comes round. He once made a drunken pass at Ana, but she forgave him. All Christian's staff will be around. Christian's helicopter is sabotaged. Upon being rescued, he could ask his rescuer to stop at a call box so he can tell Ana and his adopted parents and siblings that he is fine. But he would rather not break the journey as he is so keen to be there in person to supervise Ana.
3 Ana agrees to marry him, and he throws a tantrum when she doesn't agree to obey.
4 Once married, Ana tries to keep her own surname for use at work, but agrees to drop it when Christian starts spitting the dummy again.
5 He spies on her. He buys up the company where she gets a job.
Please, one of you get a copy of the books and grit your teeth and review them as only you know how. I am sure I am not doing justice to just how foul and obnoxious they are.
Yeah, we thought about including that one too. But since "50 Shades" is basically a fanfic of "Twilight" and the relationship dynamic is definitely based on Bella and Edward we decided not to include it. Though, yeah, "50 Shades" has tons of examples of the "ho does it because he loves me" explanation of abuse.
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